Every day we experience numerous ups and downs.  More often than not it is the ‘downs’ that we allow to fester in our minds.  For instance, our plans get changed or cancelled at the last minute, our hopes or dreams seem further away due to changes in circumstances, or our lives change, and our path takes an unexpected turn.  Our responses to these things are powerful because our beliefs are challenged, and it doesn’t sit right with us.  When we stop worrying about unimportant matters, we can devote so much more of ourselves to what is truly important.

One of the things I ask my clients to do is to get their thoughts, feelings and worries out of their heads.  Write on paper or write in notes on your phone or on your computer or random scraps of paper or a napkin, whichever way works for you.  Thoughts that that are swirling around your head, literally everything!  Some may seem trivial, just little things that get on your nerves, or some may feel more fundamental.  Just let it all come out.  If the task feels overwhelming, start by setting a timer, just 5 or 10 minutes to begin with.  Get it all out.  Seeing your thoughts written down helps you to understand yourself more and unravel areas that you can start to improve.  It may start to feel good…

Once you have everything written down, divide them into 3 columns A, B & C.  In the A column put the smaller annoyances; things that irked you – someone taking your parking space, someone leaving litter on the street, you forgot to do something, a trolley at the supermarket with a dodgy wheel…you get the gist.  Then in Column B write things that you would consider to be ‘mid annoyances.  And then Column C things that you consider to be deep rooted, things that really are important to you and are causing you worry.  You may push them deep down inside you, but they are still there, on your mind causing worry.

Start with the A column, the small frustrations and annoyances which hold power over us, because they fester in our minds unless dealt with.  So, look at each one, reflect on it and challenge it.  Ask yourself:

• How will worrying about this help me?
• Are there any other ways to look at this?
• What would I advise a friend to do if they were in the same situation?
• What can I do to change the way I feel about this?

Feel the positive effect of crossing something off your list.  What a buzz it feels to finally stop the worrying over a lost parking space!

Continue this exercise with columns B and C.

This exercise builds on your problem solving skillset, be a factor to help reduce stress levels, clears your head which will help you to improve your ability to focus on what matters,  help to stop over-thinking, when you see worries ticked off your list it can elevate your mood, encourages you to open up and address your concerns,  builds self-awareness to become more in tune with your emotions, improve your sleep.

Worry and anxiety are natural emotions, everyone has them and it is our body’s natural response to stress.  But it is how we deal with this that is key.  If not dealt with can lead to anxiety disorders or even depression.  An excellent coping strategy is journaling – it is a safe space to freely vent, and it is also something you can do on your own.

It may bring up unwanted emotions (which is a good thing to address them) and you may feel you’d like to work through this with a therapist who can support you every step of the way.  Cognitive Behavioral Hypnotherapy is a great way to go through things.

Afterwards I like to finish on a positive note; so write down 3 things you have to be grateful for that day.  It might be ‘today the sun shone brightly’ or ‘I love my comfortable bed’ or ‘ I saw my friend’ – spend a second to think how that makes you feel.

This is just the gateway to the world of journaling – once you have the hang of this exercise make it a habit to do regularly.  There is no right way or wrong way – do it YOUR way.